


Samuel and The Golden Mushroom.

by oncetherewasafrog



Category: The Samdom
Genre: the samdom is alive and well
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:33:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26646814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oncetherewasafrog/pseuds/oncetherewasafrog
Summary: Sam was having a normal day, or as normal as a day can be when one has an entire fandom stalking their every move, when a higher power (The Lord and Saviour, George Harrison) gives Samuel a quest.
Kudos: 2





	Samuel and The Golden Mushroom.

It was a hot summer day, yet Samuel was still wearing a hoodie as he sat in the field playing with his dog, Poppy. The sun was shining down on them but Sam didn’t mind, he liked the warmth it brought. 

Two of his loyal followers were sat in a tree watching him (doing their best not to disrupt his peace) one of them had started an Instagram live for the other samdom fans to watch but the other one kept telling her to switch it off because she thought it was a breach of privacy (yet she was completely fine stalking her idol and hiding in a tree) and instead opted for doing quizzes on on whether or not she would make a good girlfriend for Samuel. One quiz said she wouldn’t so she decided to block the account that made it.

Samuel sat stroking Poppy as she played with a toy bone. Poppy loved the attention her owner got because many of the fans would bring her treats if they knew she would be with him. She kept looking up at the tree in hopes that the girls up there would offer her something to eat. Sam always seemed to freeze up when people wanted to play with her, as though he didn't like to share her, she didn’t mind the new people though.

After half an hour or so, Sam decided to walk Poppy back to his mum's house. His hair gently waved in the breeze as he did so, making him look like one of those models from the slow motion perfume adverts. His ocean eyes sparkled as he looked at the road before him that would lead to his home. He walked slowly, taking time to look at the flowery gardens and occasionally letting Poppy sniff the ground. 

When Samuel got home, he took off his shoes before going into the living room to say hello to his mother. Vanessa was a wonderful woman who had short blond hair and always acted kindly to the few crazed fans that would occasionally knock on the door in hope to see her youngest son. She was sitting on the sofa using her iPad when Sam walked in, but looked up and smiled when she saw her son. 

"Hello," she said fondly, "do you want some food? I've been cooking some pasta." 

“Sure,” Sam said, walking into the kitchen and getting himself the dish of pasta from the oven.

Suddenly, when picking up his food, a loud, booming voice startled him, “ SAMUEL, IT IS THE LORD AND SAVIOUR GEORGE HARRISON. I HAVE A QUEST FOR YOU.”

Sam looked blankly at his pasta. It never usually spoke to him. How odd. 

“Umm okay?” he mumbled, staring at his food suspiciously. 

“AS I AM SURE YOU ARE AWARE, I LOVE GARDENING,” the voice said. 

“Umm I didn’t know that, no,” Sam said scowling slightly.

“DO YOU NOT LISTEN TO ABBY AT ALL? SHE’S ALWAYS GOING ON ABOUT ME AND THE OTHER BEATLES.”

“Ahhh I knew I recognised your name from somewhere, yeah I just tend to switch off when she’s on one of her rambles,” Sam shrugged, still looking at his pasta, surely he was hallucinating? Had Abby and her beatlemania finally got to him?

“ANYWAY, I WOULD LIKE YOU TO RETRIEVE ME A SPECIAL MUSHROOM, IF YOU DO THIS THERE WILL BE INFINITE MONEY FOR YOUR FRIENDS.”

“Sure,” Sam said, picturing himself swimming in money like they did in the cartoons when he was younger. That seemed like a lot of fun. 

“THE MUSHROOM IN QUESTION IS EXTREMELY RARE AND IS GOLDEN IN COLOUR, THERE IS ONLY ONE IN THE WHOLE OF SCUNTHORPE,” the voice explained, with a picture of the mushroom randomly appearing on the boy’s pasta. 

“Decent.”

That night, Sam lay awake wondering what the heck had happened with his pasta. Had he been drugged? It seemed very odd, yet he had the unexplainable urge to trust the booming voice. Perhaps he should get people to help him? Afterall he was rather lazy, Abby would probably be interested. He could ask the cult? Sam rolled over and finally drifted off with the thought of asking his friends when he woke up. That night he dreamt of a bearded jesus-looking man sitting on a giant mushroom. 

When he awoke, Sam turned straight to instagram to ask the cult, Rain Supreme, if anyone wanted to help him find the magic mushroom. Obviously, he was met with the mighty cult leader’s affection, as well as several other members’ of the cult. In fact, Sam’s following had started as part of the cult’s agenda- with his best friend, Abby, starting a fan account for him as a joke. The Samdom was a curse to Samuel as he didn’t usually like the attention, however he loved his best friend and had therefore not stopped her from posting photos of him. Abby’s stan account was still extremely active as was considered one of the best accounts to follow in the fandom as she would often post never seen before photos of Samuel. 

Both Abby and Rain agreed to join Samuel’s quest to no surprise and the three decided to gather at Vanessa’s house to discuss strategy. When they arrived Abby immediately started chatting to Vanessa and playing with Poppy. It was quite clear that she loved the pair. Poppy started moving her leg showing that she liked Abby tickling her stomach. Poppy seemed to always be happy when Abby came round as she would always get attention from the girl. Rain said hello to Samuel and the three cult members went upstairs to discuss the quest. 

“You got to speak to George Harrison?” Abby asked with her mouth open in disbelief, before it immediately turned to a pout, “that is so unfair!”

Rain looked deep in thought when she spoke, “You say we have to find a mushroom? Do we have any other information?” 

Sam shook his head and tucked his hair behind his ear. He thought it was rather odd that George Harrison would send him of all people on a quest, he didn’t even like The Beatles, maybe he just had main character energy. Although he didn’t really have anything interesting about him, he didn’t really understand the samdom’s infatuation with him. All he really liked to do was play rocket league and look at memes on his phone, why did so many people ‘stan’ him? Surely Abby would be more of a main character; she was the one that managed to start the samdom. 

Abby was the kind of person to just do random things because she wanted to, she would often start projects on a whim and never finish them. Sam supposed she would be the manic pixie dream girl of the story, always bright and colourful but not actually that much use. Perhaps that made Rain the random side character that always seemed to be there when needed. Either way, he was getting side tracked and needed to focus on the task on hand; the weird golden mushroom a dead scouser wanted him to find. 

Maybe it was better to not focus on the task at hand. 

“I mean I could always ask the samdom to help?” Abby asked, looking at her best friend for a response.

Sam shrugged, if the samdom helped did that mean he would have to share the money even more?

“Perhaps if we try to look ourselves first and if we can’t do it we could ask the samdom afterwards,” Rain suggested, looking between her two friends, who both agreed. 

The three cult members eventually decided to go to Westcliff because with the reasoning that the mushroom was a rather odd thing and there were lots of odd things in Westcliff (for example, Abby’s ex) (just kidding, he wasn’t that bad.) and at the very least, it gave them a chance to go for a walk. 

Rain took the lead, with her being the mighty cult leader, and kept making mini rainbows with her hands, she had discovered could do this after she realised she was gay and it made a great party trick. Abby watched in awe at her cult leader and started grinning whereas Samuel kept a straight face (he was secretly impressed though). 

One hundred and fifty seven rainbows later, the three arrived in Westcliff on their mushroom hunt. Abby had just posted a selfie of her as Samuel and the samdom had gone wild, all of them wondering where they were going. One good thing about the samdom was that it was pretty much impossible to get kidnapped with so many creepy girls following Sam around all day. It was weirdly comforting, kind of. 

“Oooh can we go dance on the white bridge?” Abby asked, already heading over to the structure. She was wearing a pair of skinny jeans and an oversized Beatles shirt and looked like a middle aged man when her outfit was paired with her awkward dance moves. Samuel groaned internally whilst watching his best friend. As he followed her, his blue eyes reflected the light from the hot summer sun. He looked over at the cult leader, who smiled at him. 

“Oh Samuel, my idol,” She said, poking fun at the girls in the samdom by putting her hand to her head as if she was about to faint. Sam just rolled his eyes at her and grinned.

When Sam and his friends got to the bridge Abby started busting out some terrible dance moves to whatever song she had in her head (it was probably The Beatles) as promised and Sam rolled his eyes. Rain leant against the side of the bridge and watched Abby for a few seconds before deciding to join in the impromptu dance party so Sam decided to ignore them and look at memes on instagram. There weren’t any good ones. 

Sam himself didn't follow any of the samdom accounts, apart from the original three. The first was made by Abby and was still very active within the fandom. The second was made by their friend named Isaac, who still posted on it occasionally and the third and final account he followed was created by Abby’s ex and fellow cult member, Ben. The latter was a dead account now as Ben barely got to see Sam to get new pictures of him. 

“So what’s the plan now that we’re here?” Samuel asked, as he had already grown tired of his best friend’s terrible dance skills. 

“I don’t actually know, we could have a look on the field?” Rain suggested, pointing in the direction of the field outside of the college. The other two agreed and they made their way over to the grass.

“So how big was this mushroom?” Abby asked, scanning the grass. 

“I don’t actually remember,” Sam said, shrugging and purring his hands into his jean pockets, A quiet gasp could be heard from the trees at the end of the field. Obviously, a stan was in there hiding; the samdom seemed to have a thing about the young man putting his hands in his pockets. Was that a normal thing to find attractive? Samuel thought to himself. Probably not. At least it wasn’t as bad as the samdom having a collective foot fetish, he didn't particularly fancy Abby trying to get pictures of his feet.

“How do you not remember the size of a golden mushroom that appeared on your pasta?” Rain asked, putting her hands on her hips.

“I dunno.”

“Could you not take a picture of it?” Abby asked scowling slightly as if it was an obvious thing to do.

“Funnily enough, when a random Scouser somehow projects a photo of a golden mushroom onto my food, my first thought is not to get out my phone and take a photo,” Samuel said, tilting his head to the side as if his best friend was stupid (which she wasn’t, she just lacked common sense). 

“Okay, first of all,” Abby said putting her hands on her hips and raising the pitch of her voice in a way she only did when she was excited or arguing, “George Harrison is not a random Scouser, he is one of the members of The Beatles, AKA the best band in the world-”

“Debatable.” Sam deadpanned with the ghost of a smirk on his face.

Abby scrunched up her facial features and waved her hands around whilst making a noise. She made this noise frequently in front of Sam and yet he could never really find any words to describe the it apart from stupid. He often reminded her that she sounded like a buffoon when she did it but she either didn’t care or was so annoyed that she didn’t realise she was making it and that amused Sam greatly.

“Anyway,” Rain said, bringing the attention back towards her so no heated Beatles debate could begin, “We should maybe look around on the ground, see if it’s here.”

After about twenty minutes, the questers gave up and decided to sit down in the grass (they were pretty sure the mushroom wasn’t there so it was fine). Abby started live tweeting every single minute movement that Samuel made, which the samdom ate up and made Sam roll his eyes (which the samdom loved even more). Rain checked in on the cult and let them all know about the mushroom search. This caused the cult to start sending in their best mushroom memes, making Rain appreciate her creation. The cult truly was her pride and joy. 

After sitting in the field for a few hours and not really having the motivation to look any further for the mushroom the group decided to reconvene in the morning at Sam’s dad’s house. Although, it was debatable whether they would all be awake; Abby decided that if Sam wasn’t awake she’d just get his brother to let her in and wake him up herself. Perhaps she could do it with a pan and a spoon, the idea alone made an evil smile play at her lips. She really hoped her best friend would be asleep. Was that why he thought she had bad morals? 

****  
  


That evening, Sam got a lift from his mother to his dad’s house. He once again fell asleep dreaming of men on mushrooms. But this time the man was singing about peace and love, Abby was almost definitely getting to him. He let the bright colours and chanting take over as he finally surrendered to the deep sleep. Hare Krishna. 

When it was time to go over to her best friend’s house, Abby discovered that Samuel was unfortunately already awake. That morning she had decided to wear one of her summer dresses that had blue boats on it and had put her hair into a messy bun in an attempt to stay cool. As she walked through the park however, she could still feel herself begin to heat up.

When Abby got to the house, Rain was already there in the living room with Sam. The two were playing Wii tennis and as usual Sam was winning. Abby got herself a glass and filled it with water before going though to the living room and sitting with her friends. Sam was obliterating Rain, with him consistently scoring and getting double bounces, Rain groaned in frustration as Sam once again won a game. 

Sam’s hair flowed behind him, attempting to catch up with the rest of his body which was cheering from his success. Rain watched it in awe, She’d never let him know but she was secretly in love with his golden locks. It almost made losing to her friend worth it, but not quite and she was determined to beat him at least once. 

“Can I wash up if you’re going to be playing that?” Abby asked, already starting to get up from the chair. 

“Sure,” Sam said, his eyes not leaving the screen as he selected another match with Rain. He didn’t really get his friend’s obsession with doing what he classed as a mundane chore but she was yet to break any pots whilst doing it so he had given up questioning it and just let her. Plus, the less time she was in the room, the less time she would get to sneakily take photos of him for the samdom and that was always a positive in Sam’s eyes. 

Abby strolled into the kitchen and set her eyes on the pile of dirty dishes whilst grinning, for some reason she found washing up to be weirdly soothing and as it was something that she didn’t get the chance to do whilst at home, she would often ask to do it at Sam’s house. She took all the dirty dishes out of the sink and placed them on the side next to the stove before filling up the bowl with hot soapy water. There was only one thing that Abby would never wash and that was a bottle that Sam’s father had which seemed to always have some kind of milkshake in it. The girl looked in the cupboard under the sink for a brillo pad before she started to scrub at a particularly greasy baking tray. What on earth did these people eat that made everything so dirty?

After washing up, Abby decided to go and watch Sam and Rain on the Wii again. They had moved onto bowling now and Rain was kicking Samuel’s bottom. (Figuratively speaking, Rain would never actually kick Sam)

“So when are we going to look for the Mushroom? Have either of you had any ideas where to look?” She asked, settling down into the chair.

Neither Sam nor Rain said anything as they were concentrating on the screen, watching whether or not Sam’s last throw would get him a strike or not. Abby rolled her eyes and decided to go find Samuel’s older brother Jacob, whom she called Fred (which really annoyed Sam), to entertain her. As usual, he was in his room shouting slightly racist remarks into his microphone whilst playing some kind of game. He quickly flipped up his microphone when he saw her standing quietly outside his room. 

“Is there anything I can help you with?” He asked, his eyes flicking from the screen to the girl and then back again. 

“I’m bored,” Abby said, sighing in the most dramatic way she could before plonking herself on the bed behind her friend and finding something on the windowsill to fiddle with, she decided to fiddle with part of a coat hanger that had been there for months. 

“Well that’s great and all but I’m online so I can’t just drop everything to entertain you.” The manchild said before flicking his microphone back down to shout at whoever he was playing with. 

Abby pouted but didn’t go away, instead choosing to fiddle with the penknife that Jacob had on the windowsill. The girl had called Jacob ‘Fred’ since she had first become friends with Sam and they had refused to tell her his name as a joke. Although it wasn’t her that had first called him Fred, she did think that he resembled the character from Scooby Doo (and had told him so on snapchat once when she was drunk). 

A curdling yell from the living room caused them to both look at each other before clambering quickly off of the bed to investigate. Jacob threw his headset onto the bed and grabbed his sword which caused Abby to roll her eyes. The two rushed down the stairs, with Abby slipping down the final two steps and almost crashing into the cupboard near the front door. 

When the pair reached the living room they found a teenage girl gripping onto Sam and sobbing hysterically. Rain stood frozen at the other end of the room staring at her friend underneath the crazed female. Sam was trying to push the girl off but failing miserably. 

“OMG SAMUEL IT’S REALLY YOU!” The girl squealed, somehow tightening her already metal grip on the young man in question. Sam glared at his best friend, it was her that technically started this in the first place. It was times like this that Sam really wished that Abby wasn’t as enthusiastic over him. It just encouraged the other deranged teenage girls to act the same way and completely breach his personal space and privacy.

“Hey Fred,” Abby said, smirking, “guess what.”

Jacob looked at her quizzically, knowing already that he would regret asking. 

“What?” he asked, sighing and lowering the sword slightly. 

Abby’s face lit up as she reached under the skirt of her summer dress. 

“ABBY NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO BE FLASHING MY BROTHER,” Sam shouted, trying to cover his eyes (with no success) to shield himself from the horror that was unveiling before him. Rain looked from Abby to Sam as if she wasn’t sure what to do before deciding to turn to face the wall and distract herself by making another rainbow with her hands. 

“It’s fine,” Abby said, stringing out the latter word and rolling her eyes. The girl then pulled out three throwing knives from under her skirt and presented them to Sam’s brother, “Throwing knives!”

“Where were you even storing them?” Rain asked, having had turned back around out of curiosity. Abby grinned but said nothing. The crazed female scrunched up her nose but kept clinging to her idol. 

“See! Throwing knives are so much better because I can throw them at the crazed female without getting close enough for her to bitch slap me,” the teenager said, matter of factly pointing the tip of the knife towards Sam and the random female whilst facing Jacob. 

“Okay, but with your coordination you’ll probably miss and you only have three to throw,” The twenty year old replied, grasping his sword tighter, “whereas with this, I can use it as many times as I please.”

Abby huffed before replying, “Yeah but with the sword being so big, surely it makes it easier to be stopped. With these knives the attack is quick.”

“How is a sword easy to stop?” Jacob asked, frowning and tilting his head slightly. Abby's logic often confused him. 

With the focus on his brother and best friend, Sam managed to free himself from the grip of the female and pushed her off of him before standing up. 

“You can stop a sword, you’ll just probably cut yourself in the process.”

“Ahh yes, I’d love to see that.”

With Abby still technically pointing a knife at the Samdom fan, the girl was frozen in place. Sam didn’t even know how she had gotten in. The backdoor was locked and the front one locked automatically. Had she been here a while? Sam shuddered at the thought and edged away from her. She had just sort of appeared from the hallway whilst he and Rain had been playing Wii bowling and had thrown herself at him. 

“Well I’m not going to get any swords thrown at me anytime soon.” 

“But you wouldn’t have a chance to stop one if you did.”

Sam rolled his eyes before speaking up, “Abby you’re a pacifist. I have no idea why you have throwing knives on you and I especially do not want to know where you were keeping them but I know for a fact that you won’t actually use them.”

“Good point,” Abby said, lowering the knives and standing up straighter. She looked down at the knives then at the girl who was staring manically at Sam again. “Do you want them?” She asked after a second, holding them out to Samuel. 

“Sure,” He said, taking them and turning towards the fan and pointing the knife at her, “Leave or we will restrain you and call the police.”

The girl sat up a little bit straighter and her eyes widened as she stared at her idol. He looked so beautiful with his eyes glaring into her skin and his hair falling in front of his face slightly. His body was stiff and solid, he looked so strong. She smiled slightly at where her thoughts were taking her. 

Jacob Chuckled, “I think she likes that idea,” He slapped his brother on the back with his sword free hand.

Sam frowned at the revelation before quickly recovering, “Fine, If you don’t leave now, I will cut off my hair and burn it,” he said slowly, articulating each word with an undercurrent of ice. The girl shuddered with fear in her eyes.

“No!” Rain shouted, putting her arm out as if to protect herself from the terrible words that were coming out of her friend’s mouth. How could he do such a thing? His hair was beautiful. 

“Yes,” Sam said, his eyes not leaving the intruder as he slowly brought his hand holding the knife up to his hair.

The girl had tears in her eyes, why would her idol do this? The samdom would hate her and make her life a misery, her account would be reported. All of her followers would be gone. She hung her head in shame before trudging past Samuel, the light of her life, to the front door. 

“It’ll be locked,” Jacob said, slipping past her and producing a key from his pocket before letting her disappear back to wherever she came. 

The cult members were all staring at each other when Jacob returned to the living room. Rain was frowning as if still trying to work out how the heck the girl managed to sneak up on them whilst they were playing another game of Wii bowling (she had been winning again). She looked at the television screen which was still showing the bowling alley. 

“I mean the throwing knives were technically more useful at defending the house than the sword,” Abby said, attempting (and failing) to lighten the mood (everyone just glared at her). She looked down at the rug trying to hide her smile. 

“I still do not understand why you have a cult dedicated to worshipping you,” Jacob said, putting his hands in his pockets and looking at his younger brother. Sure he wasn’t exactly ugly but he had practically no personality, the teen just seemed to play rocket league all day. 

“Technically,” Rain said, stepping forward and holding up her finger, “The cult does many other things, including having a youtube channel and deciding who everyone would be if we recreated Shrek. Why, would you like to join?”

“Most definitely not,” Jacob deadpanned. 

“At the moment we’re trying to find a golden mushroom!” Abby said, rolling onto her tiptoes in excitement. She had either not picked up on Jacob’s tone or was choosing to ignore it for the sake of lightening the mood.

Jacob scowled slightly as the cult members took it in turns to tell him about George Harrison and the quest he had given Sam (Abby went into lots of detail about The Beatles member) and how they had looked in Westcliff but gave up after searching in the field outside of Leggott. Rain explained how she had made rainbows on the way there to entertain them on the walk and how they had a mini dance break on the white bridge. 

Jacob looked rather bewildered by the end of the explanation but quickly recovered, “So you’re telling me that despite most mushrooms growing in the forest or wooded areas, you haven’t actually looked in the woods yet?” He scowled slightly before continuing, “Let me get my shoes and I’ll come with you.”

“Yay adventures with Fred!” Abby said, after the man had left the room with his sword. She grinned at Sam who gave her a look of defeat. He knew by now that there was no chance of her calling his brother by his actual name. Or at least not in front of him. 

“Why do you have an obsession with my brother?” He asked instead, pushing his luscious locks out of his face in exasperation from his best friend.

Before Abby could respond however, Rain stepped in, “We should probably get ready too, I don’t particularly fancy playing Wii sports anymore.”

The crew got ready and set off down the steps that led from Sam’s house to the road. They had decided to walk to the nature reserve next to Abby’s house because it was closer than Atkinson's Warren and they were all rather lazy (what with them being teenagers and all. Apart from Jacob. He was old.) Sam had put another hoodie on, despite it being the middle of summer and both Rain and Abby were getting at him for it. Jacob took the lead, trying to ignore the buffoonery behind him. He was wearing a plain t-shirt and jeans as well as his usual jam coloured lace up shoes. 

Entering through the hole in the fence, the questers took a look over the vast field dotted with trees over to the wooded area. A few dog walkers were around but none of them cared to notice the small group of oddballs that had entered the nature reserve. Abby grasped the opportunity to snap a quick photograph of Sam with the vast view in the background. His hair was gently waving in the breeze which brought the photo to life, he looked like tarzan surrounded by all the greenery. Rain looked over her friend's shoulder at the photo before smiling, Samuel looked truly wonderful. The younger female posted it immediately.

Gasps escaped from the trees as the Samdom stans looked at the new photo that Abby had just posted. One fainted and fell out of a tree with a thud; all of the others were too engrossed in the picture to notice. Nobody was really sure how the stans got up in the trees but they always seemed to be hiding there, even Abby in all her samdom wisdom wasn’t quite sure how it happened (although she was ashamed to admit that she had found herself in a tree watching her best friend on more than one occasion). 

(In fact, Rain had been sitting in the tree with her.) 

(They had agreed not to tell Samuel.)

Jacob cleared his throat, taking the focus away from the new photo, “So, we could start by scouring the field and end up in the woods?” The others nodded and they set off with everyone staring at the ground for the mushroom (apart from Abby, who immediately started daydreaming and having an imaginary conversation with Vanessa). 

“Oooh look, some deer!” Rain said, pointing at the animals running back into the forest. 

“Damn we haven’t seen any deer in here for ages,” Abby said, jumping back into reality before giving a single laugh, “hey, what do you call a deer with no eyes?” 

“I don’t know, what do you call a deer with no eyes?” Sam deadpanned, still scanning the grass for the golden mushroom that would bring him riches.

“No eye-deer!” Abby said laughing and ignoring the groans that came from both the Ruddock brothers, “What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?”

Rain decided to humour her friend and ask after silence from the other two members of the questing party, “I don’t know, what do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?”

“Still no eye-deer!” Abby said, bursting out laughing at her own joke. 

“And you said I was bad for dad jokes,” Sam said, looking at his friend. Who rolled her eyes in response. (Or at least attempted to, Abby had never really got the hang of eye rolling.)

The group continued to scour the field before turning to the wooded part of the nature reserve. The light breeze rustled the leaves overhead as Rain checked the trunks of trees and Sam checked the patches of moss, brambles and nettles. Despite it not having rained in several days, the floor of the nature reserve was moist and slightly muddy, with decomposing leaves scattered around. 

Abby had spotted a Samuel stan in the trees filming the group but had decided not to say anything as her best friend still seemed on edge from the earlier encounter in the house. She had instead put on some of her groovy tunes and was dancing along to her terrible nineties playlist (Jacob had started trying to ignore her existence after she had started singing I’m too sexy) and kept glancing around to check for the scary youths on bikes. 

Sam wished Poppy was there, he loved his dog and perhaps she could’ve been useful for trying to sniff out the mushroom like those pigs that could smell truffles. He still didn’t really get why George Harrison would send him of all people on a quest. Perhaps he just couldn't get hold of Abby? It was all very odd. He really couldn't care less about The Beatles, and Abby only made it worse with her incessant praising of the group. 

Actually, since The Beatles were so into drugs, was it possible that they were looking for the wrong kind of mushroom? Sam stood up from the overgrown grass he had been looking at and turned round to face his friends and brother. His hair followed and swished across his face, he caught a glimpse of a stan swooning from the top of a tree and a slight smirk formed on his face. As much as he hated the invasion of privacy (and he would never admit this to Abby) he did rather like all how all the girls seemed to think they were in love with him, it was a great ego boost. 

“Why are we so sure that it's a mushroom in the wild? I mean The Beatles did a whole lot of drugs, how do we not know that we’re searching for some form of shrooms?” Sam asked, looking at each member of the group in turn, trying to gauge their reactions. Was this a stupid idea? 

“I guess that would explain why it’s a golden mushroom,” Rain said, tilting her head in thought, “But then again, I know nothing about drugs.”

“Fortunately, I know the local Drug dealer!” Sam said with fake enthusiasm, Abby grinned at him and rolled her eyes. Jacob tutted and folded his arms like a disapproving parent (although everyone knew that he definitely did not have the maturity to be a father quite yet.) 

Sam motioned for the others to follow him as he spun around and started walking to the address of the drug den. A chorus of gasps echoed from the trees as his hair spun around with him. Rain grinned at the back of her friend’s head, appreciating his hair in all its glory. She sometimes dreamed of cutting off a lock and sleeping with it under her pillow but she knew that if she did she would be banished from the samdom forever.

The group eventually reached the house of the well known drug dealer, Rhys. It was a fairly normal house with a red door, which Abby remembered was the favourite colour of the drug dealer’s mother. (She used to have a crush on him, it was a weird time.)The garden contained some overgrown grass and a hedge that looked to be half dead. Rain looked around, having never been to a drug dealer’s house before, i”t was much like she had expected; It was a kind of messy-looking house in a kind of messy-looking area. 

Sam knocked on the door and stood back waiting for a reply, putting his hands in his pockets as he did so, he always looked so relaxed; his terrible posture made it look like he was constantly leaning on something. Even his facial expression was always relaxed, it always made him seem like the voice of reason which occasionally annoyed Abby. 

(But who could stay annoyed at Sam?)

(Definitely not Abby.)

After about two minutes of waiting, a groggy-looking Rhys opened the door. He was wearing a grey crinkled shirt and some tracksuit bottoms. The drug dealer looked around at the ragtag group of questers and rubbed his face as if trying to wake himself up. His eyes finally landed on Sam and he gave a slight nod in recognition. 

“Sam.”

“Eyyy.”

“We’re on a quest and we thought you could help!” Abby said, trying to get straight to the point. She could see Jacob roll his eyes at her lack of social pleasantries but decided to ignore him. It was important that she wasn’t seen by the Fowlers at a drug dealer's house (because somehow she didn’t think her mother would buy that she was searching for a golden mushroom) and Lisa would most definitely say something. 

Rhys frowned at the girl and turned back to Samuel, “ So you’re wanting to go on a trip? I’m pretty sure I’ve got something you could use.”

Jacob stepped forward, reannouncing his presence, “Do you really think I would let these two go anywhere near hallucinogens?” he said, pointing at Abby and Rain (the former’s eyes were gleaming with the thought of doing drugs and the latter had spotted a pigeon in a tree and had started waving at it). Abby turned to Jacob and stuck out her bottom lip like a little child. Rhys looked at the two questers before turning back to Jacob and shrugging. 

Suddenly, Abb’s phone started buzzing, which was odd in two ways, the first being that she always had her phone on silent and the second being that she barely ever got any messages. She took it out of her dress pocket (yes her dress had pockets!) and looked at the screen. 

“Rain, check the samdom,” Abby whispered, looking at her friend. Rain quickly snapped back to reality at the sound of her name and stopped looking at the pigeon. She took out her own phone and opened up instagram, before looking back at Abby and grinning, gosh she loved the Samdom. 

Abby looked at Sam and Rhys, the former of whom was trying to explain how he wasn’t high when the voice had told him about the mushroom. Abby rolled her eyes at them before trying to get their attention. The teenager started waving her arms slightly to no avail before clapping and saying Sam’s name. 

Eventually, Sam realised that his best friend wasn’t just having a mini fit and was in fact trying to get his attention. He turned around and she pointed to her phone screen enthusiastically. Samuel tilted his head in confusion at his friend, sometimes she would get excited over the weirdest things (like washing up for instance).

“You’re going to have to use your words,” Sam said, prompting her to explain her outburst when he had finally started getting somewhere with explaining the mushroom quest to Rhys. The girl made some incoherent noise before speaking.

“The Samdom, they figured it out!” She grinned, Waving her phone in Sam’s face in a way that he wouldn’t be able to read the screen even if he tried, which he didn’t. 

“According to Samlover221, The golden mushroom is located in town. Goldilocks5eva and Sam_slave saw it when they were shopping and its owned by a notorious drug dealer called Isaac-” Rain cut herself off and looked up from her phone screen which she had been reading from, “Wait, Abby isn’t Isaac’s last name Rowbothem?” 

“Yes...” Abby trailed off, stopping waving her phone at Sam to read the samdom message herself, having only skimmed the first couple of lines last time. 

“Are you trying to tell me that the lispy queer has somehow made it into the drug world?” Jacob asked, harshly, causing Rain to look at him with disgust. 

“Oiii, don’t call my best friend that,” Abby said, her voice slightly raised as she glared at the twenty year old. 

“TASTE THE RAINBOW!” Rain yelled as rays of colour shot from her hands at Jacob, causing him to choke.

“Yanno, I could’ve sworn I was sober,” Rhys muttered, staring bewildered at the scene before him. Why was there a girl shooting rainbows? And why did she look vaguely familiar? 

“And before you start, he is not gay, he is bisexual and is happily in a relationship with a girl.” Abby said, still glaring at the now spluttering Jacob. He had started to crouch in an attempt to shield himself from the rainbow, but Rain let it keep coming from her hand. 

“I do not appreciate your language,” She said eventually, in an eerily calm voice before she put her hands down and stopped the colour spurting out from them. 

Jacob just coughed in reply and tried to catch his breath. 

“Well then,” Sam deadpanned, taking in the scene before him. He has to admit, it was nice to see Jacob finally see some repercussion for his slight homophobia even if he still wasn’t really sure if his brother was serious about it most of the time. Sam turned to look at Rhys who was staring open mouthed at Rain. 

“How?” The drug dealer trailed off, Rain just looked passively at him before she turned back to Jacob and scowled. The man finally managed to stand up and stared at Rain with slight fear in his eyes before composing himself and reverting back to his normal blank facial expression. Perhaps it was a family thing to have an excellent poker face?

“So should I message Isaac?” Abby asked, not liking the tension that was building between the group. Abby had never been one for confrontation, it terrified her and was probably the reason she got into situations that she didn’t really want to be in. Without waiting for a reply she started typing a message to her bestie.

Abby and Isaac had been best friends for several years and Abby liked to describe him as the same person as her but male and more emo. Isaac was just as excitable as she was and would often encourage her ‘creative’ ideas (which was why they often ended up in slightly dodgy situations). The pair had spent enough time together that they had too many inside jokes to count and Abby hoped that they would stay best friends until death. Isaac was her favourite person. 

Surprisingly, Isaac replied straight away. Abby grinned as she saw the notification, before reading it aloud to the group, “I’m in town at the moment, why?”

The girl immediately replied saying that they’d meet him.

“You may be a drug dealer, but we have our own drug dealer, and blackjack and hookers,” Abby said confidently to Rhys, then turned to Sam, “Did I use that right?”

Sam shook his head and a small smile crept onto his face, “Yanno, asking if you used it correctly just ruined the whole thing.”

The girl dramatically dropped her head in shame, although a smile could be seen playing at her lips as she did so, Rain patted her back in comfort anyway. The cult leader was well known for giving pats to other cult members as a source of comfort. Abby pretended to wipe a tear from her eye before standing up straight again as though nothing had happened. 

“Adios druggo,” The girl said with a slight nod of her head before walking in the direction of town, expecting the rest of the questers to follow her.

Rain started to make rainbows as a source of entertainment again as the group made their way into Scunthorpe town centre. The highstreet was dusty like usual, and a couple of boys on bikes were riding on the road, hurling abuse at each other. Half the shops had the shutters down and the other half had men and women milling about outside the doors, holding cans of goodness knows what. The Sun did little to improve the mood of those in the incredibly sorry excuse for a town centre.

“According to snap maps, He’s that way,” Abby stated, pointing down Frod Road. 

“With your sense of direction, anything is possible,” Sam muttered, rolling his eyes but deciding to walk in the direction his best friend was pointing nonetheless. 

They reached a shabby looking shop when Abby told the group that it said they were with Isaac. The building looked like almost every other on the street and had one window boarded up.

Jacob stared at it before looking at Abby, “What is your best friend doing in a place like this?”

The girl shrugged in reply, before deciding to head straight in. However, two men quickly stopped her from getting too far. As she was short, the males towered over her, which caused Abby to shrink into herself and walk back to the group.

“Why did you think that just walking in would be a good idea? If a bloody scouser couldn’t get his hands on the mushroom, it obviously won’t be easy to do by force,” Sam said, folding his arms. 

“In Our Lord and Saviour, George Harrison’s defence, he is dead.”

Rain looked back at the shop, the two men were still standing there looking at them. She supposed that they looked rather out of place on Frod Road. With Abby in her summer dress, looking as cheerful as a little pixie despite having just been turned away by them. Jacob would’ve looked fairly normal if it wasn’t for the fact that the rainbow had left him slightly sparkly in a way that was too unnatural to be sweat. Rain thought Sam looked the most normal out of the group, but that in itself made him stand out. Sam was beautiful. 

“I could always message Isaac to meet us outside?” Abby asked, looking around at the group that was now standing in a circle.

Sam shook his head, if the men didn’t let Abby, Isaac’s best friend, in the shop then that surely meant that Isaac didn’t want to see them. Although, he didn’t really see why Isaac had his snap maps location on if he didn’t want to be seen. 

“Well, what do we do instead?” Asked Rain, taking a quick look at the men again, she wasn’t sure if she could see some other people lurking in the shop.

“There is one thing that is more terrifying than built up men,” Sam said absently, “And that is teenage girls.”

“You’re going to ask the Samdom to help?” Abby and Rain asked in surprised unison. Sam never asked the Samdom for help, Abby knew it would be an honour for all involved. 

“I mean if this old scouser is giving me loads of money I’m sure I could make a charitable donation in the Samdom’s name or something?” Sam said, shrugging. 

“Aw, that would be beautiful Sam!” Rain exclaimed. He was so charitable! It was reasons like this that she was truly in the samdom (although it was still mainly just his hair). She took out her phone and began texting away in the various group chats she was in to spread the word. 

Abby had already taken a photo of Sam and had posted it onto her stan account to try to round up the troops before moving on to twitter to share the message on there as well. Sam and Jacob just stood there awkwardly, looking around at the more or less deserted street. To say it was the middle of summer, there weren’t many people milling around on the streets. Even the local crackheads didn’t seem to be there, it was unsettling. 

“Right,” Abby said, breaking the silence, “They’re on the way.”

Immediately after saying this teenage girls seemed to slowly creep out from the shadows, Abby and Rain started waving at a few in recognition. Sam stood gaping at the masses of girls that just kept coming, he then remembered that he didn’t show emotion and quickly shut his mouth and went back to his normal plain expression. 

The men started to appear from the back of the shop as well, soon there were twenty of them all with arms folded and set jaws. They stood in a line and stared passively out into the road. 

“This is SamLover69 and Goldi1ocks,” Abby said, motioning to two girls who stood, staring wide-eyed at Samuel.

One of them took a step towards her idol, which caused Sam to grimace slightly, before returning to his passive expression. The other girl quickly whipped out her phone, turned around and took a selfie with Sam before he could even blink. Abby chuckled before hugging the girls as if she already knew them personally. Sam shuddered, hating to think what weird and slightly creepy things his friend had done together with them.

“I just don’t get why Isaac isn’t letting me see him, I’m his favourite person,” Abby explained, turning to face the Samdom. A few of the girls nodded slightly and one put her arm around the girl for comfort. Abby lent into the touch, she didn’t get why Isaac was doing this, he had never acted like this before.

Jacob rolled his eyes at Abby’s back, before clasping his hands together, “Right, we need to organise the attack to get this mushroom.” He turned to Rain, “can you do that rainbow thing to all of them?”

Rain nodded quickly before bursting out into a grin, she loved shooting people with rainbows, it was incredibly gay and she lived for it. She had always thought that there was a true beauty in taking down a man, who looked tough and masculine, with a rainbow.

“Abby,” The young man said, turning to the girl, who immediately turned around to look at her friend and smiled.

“Fred.”

“Could you please organise the band of psychotic females?”

“But of course,” She said before turning back to the crowd of girls that had arrived to fight for their idol, “right, we are doing this for Samuel, we need to destroy those men and get inside.”

The men that had appeared from the shop started to look around at the crowd of girls, who in turn, grinned in unison at them. The bodyguards glared back at them but did not move from their positions in front of the shop.

“TASTE THE RAINBOW!” Rain yelled suddenly, as giant streams of colour spewed from her hands in the direction of the men. The colours hit about five of them and much like with Jacob, they started coughing and slowly sinking to the ground outside the shop. About ten of the men started to charge towards Rain but were swiftly stopped by a group of the Sam stans who crowded round them and started screaming.The teens quickly hooked themselves onto the men and waved their phones in their faces trying to distract them and trap them in the middle of a huge swarm of fangirls.

“OMG LOOK AT THIS ADORABLE PHOTO OF SAM.”

“WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO HURT SAMUEL?”

“SAM IS MY FUTURE HUSBAND, DON’T YOU DARE TRY HURT HIS FRIENDS.”

Sam shuddered as he heard the last comment but appreciated the sentiment nonetheless. He looked at the shop, there were only five men left standing, watching the scene unfold in front of them. Jacob glared at them but made no effort to move from his position next to his brother. 

“Bro, I literally have the best thing,” Abby said to Sam, fishing under her skirt once again.

"Oh God," her friend grumbled, turning away immediately. He really questioned his friend’s existence sometimes, this was one of those times. She was nice enough; Abby brought lots of excitement into his life. Yet she also somehow thought it was socially acceptable, normal even, to fish under her dress for random objects hidden in places that Samuel didn’t want to imagine. 

Abby felt around under her skirt before grabbing and pulling out a ginger tabby cat. It looked around before attempting to claw at Abby’s face. She dropped it in surprise and it scarpered down the street and into one of the side roads. The girl shuddered, she hated cats, in her opinion they were the spawns of satan. A horn beeped from the side road the cat had just disappeared down and Sam hoped the creature was okay, being trapped up Abby’s dress was torture enough.

The girl continued to search under the boat patterned dress and pulled out a metallic bowl with what appeared to be two taps attached to it, “I have everything AND the kitchen sink,” She explained smuggly before chuckling at her own joke, “Wait do you think you could wack one of the guys on the head with the taps?”

Sam shook his head, he didn’t particularly fancy getting close enough to some drug gang’s bodyguards so that he could hit them with a tap. Jacob was still glaring at the men and didn’t seem to be listening to Abby at all. 

The rainbows were still pouring out of Rain as though it took her no effort at all, Sam didn’t actually know if it did take her any effort, he had never really asked. It made him question once again why the dead scouser had chosen him of all people to find the mushroom, sure he had a fandom in his honour, but Abby actually liked The Beatles and Rain had superpowers for goodness sakes!

More stans were appearing from the side roads and some had started several different instagram lives of Sam from different angles, all of them swooning as they held their phones up so that the samdom members in other countries could see their idol too. Abby said hello to a few of them but for the most part the girls all crowded around the other screaming stans that were already attacking the body guards. The bodyguards in question no longer had their suave no nonsense faces on and instead had slightly fearful expressions painted on their faces. Fangirls had started stroking their arms and taking selfies with the men as well as the obvious shouting. (And tagging them all with #samdom, which was now trending in the UK and several parts of South America.)

“Right, I’m sure it’s up here somewhere,” Abby muttered to herself as she continued to fumble around under the skirt of her dress. Sam had given up looking away and was now staring at his best friend with curiosity. She had a petite frame and he wondered how the hell she had fit all of that stuff up her dress, especially as she still seemed to be walking normally as though there was no extra weight attached to her. 

Finally, the girl grinned and did a little jump before pulling out a giant rocket launcher. Jacob whipped his head around as he saw the girl take it out in the corner of his eye and both he and his little brother took a step back. 

“Do you like it?” Abby said grinning at Jacob in excitement whilst swinging it around to show her friends (and almost knocking some stans over in the process). Sam slowly put his hands up in front of his chest with his eyes watching his friend’s every move.

“Is that a Paszerschreck?” Jacob asked, looking at the weapon with interest before continuing, “where the hell did you even get that?”

The girl smiled nonchalauntly, “Do you like it?” She repeated again.

Samuel rolled his eyes as he watched his brother's glaze over in amazement. The girl was moving the rocket launcher slowly towards the twenty year old. Teasing him, she took a step forward so the rocket launcher was easily within his grasp. 

“You know, I’m a pacifist so I can’t use it,” Abby said in a stage whisper, she held the weapon so Jacob could take a hold of it. Sam discovered how far back he could roll his eyes after hearing the remark and decided to step in before his brother became a full blown nazi. 

“Abby, it’s a rocket launcher, you can’t use it in the middle of the town centre. Plus, Isaac is in that building, you don’t want him to get hurt, do you?” The teenager explained, pointing to the building. The men at the door seemed to be slightly on edge with the girl waving the giant weapon around, but they stood in place, guarding the shop nonetheless. 

Beside them, the guards who were being sprayed with rainbow were all curled up on the floor, Sam wasn’t totally sure if they were conscious but decided that Rain wouldn’t hurt anyone badly and that it was best not to question the mighty cult leader. The colour sprayed over the heads of the stans who were still obsessively screaming at the other drug den men. If it was a less dramatic scenario, he would’ve probably gotten his phone out to take a photo. He was fairly surprised that Abby hadn’t gotten her phone to take photos, she was always snapping away on her phone, whether it was unsolicited photos of him or a pretty sunset. 

“You make a good point,” Abby stated, sadly tucking the Panzerschreck back away up her skirt, she didn’t want to hurt Isaac, even if he had set twenty bodyguards on her and Sam. Jacob watched it disappear grievously before turning to give a quick glare to his brother. 

“So who fancies attacking someone with a sink?” The girl asked, picking up the discarded metal object, not really knowing what to do anymore. She guessed that there were just about enough Sam stans to take down three of the remaining guards but that still left two for the questers to take care of. 

“Fuck it,” said Sam, picking up the sink and launching at the two guards, one of whom managed to dodge the missile. The other got hit straight in the head and immediately fell down. 

The four bodyguards left standing took a look at their comrade in unison before turning back to look at the questers and Sam stans. The guard furthest to the left slowly started walking towards them with his jaw set and his lips in a thin line. It made Samuel slightly fearful although he didn’t let it show. Beside him, Abby took a miniscule step backwards but kept eye contact with the man.

“Sam, do you still have those throwing knives I gave to you?” Abby asked, slowly shuffling behind her friend. 

Sam felt in his hoodie pocket and pulled out a single throwing knife. He looked at it then at the guard slowly creeping towards them before looking back at the knife again. Was he really going to try to throw a knife at a person? He didn’t particularly want to. His hair waved in the breeze as he continued to think, he could see Abby swoon out of the corner of his eye but decided to ignore it. No, he couldn’t throw a knife, there was too much evidence, he thought, looking around at all the creepy teens filming him. 

“RUN,” Abby shouted, snapping Sam back into reality, the man was only about two metres away, making Sam jump before recomposing himself. 

Rather than running away like a normal person, Abby darted forward, weaving through the guards and into the shop. It looked fairly normal inside, from the glimpse she got before deciding to run down the biscuit aisle. She grabbed a packet of bourbons for a snack later as she ran to the back of the shop and through the staff only door. 

“ISAAC WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” 

The girl was standing in a fairly large room facing her best friend who sat frozen at a desk, holding what appeared to be a brownie to his lips. The walls had brown peeling wallpaper on them which made Abby wonder why drug dens always seemed to be badly decorated, it wasn’t like they didn’t have any money. If she ever became a drug overlord she would definitely make sure her drug den was nicely decorated, perhaps she would even paint some artwork for the walls. 

Outside the shop, Sam had been captured into the grasp of the bodyguard, the throwing knife had been quickly wrestled out of his grasp and had been thrown to the side. The girls recording instagram lives were all looking at each other in horror, not really knowing what to do. Was it better to let the rest of the samdom down and stop recording to go and help or should they keep going in case it would be needed for evidence in a court. Some stans from the mob realised their idol was in trouble and started trying to pull the drug man off of their precious idol. Sam stood paralysed with fear, partially from the man restraining him but also because of all the teenage girls surrounding him, screaming. 

After running away from the bodyguard himself, Jacob turned around to see where Sam and Abby had gone, he quickly spotted his brother getting mauled by the bodyguard and about twenty rabid teens. He couldn’t spot Abby anywhere, controlling them so he ran back to help his brother.

The young man dived into the crowd with force, knocking down the guard in the process. Jacob’s battle cry echoed throughout the street as he grabbed his brother and yanked him out of the grasp of the prying girls. 

"In the name of Queen Elizabeth II!" He yelled, grasping at his brother’s shirt and heaving. He was not going to let those girls get to his brother, they would eat him alive, he was only small for goodness sakes. 

Fortunately, the queen seemed to be on his side, and his brother collapsed on top of him as the stans finally let go and focused on attacking the security guard that had captured their idol. Jacob pushed his younger sibling away before standing up and brushing himself off. Samuel scowled at him before getting up and doing the same. 

Inside the shop, Abby still stood facing her best friend, who in turn was looking back at her. The young man put the brownie in his mouth and grinned, making crumbs of cake fall from the corners of his mouth. Abby rolled her eyes, immediately forgiving him for sending bodyguards out to fight her and the other questers, how could she be annoyed at him when he was as messy as a toddler? Nobody could hate Isaac. 

“Yanno because you love me, could you please reign your men in?” Abby asked sweetly, walking towards her bestie and hoisting herself up on the corner of the desk. Her legs danged in the air as she couldn’t touch the floor so she decided to curl them up on the table instead. 

“Sure,” Isaac said, pressing a small button on his desk. He continued to munch on the brownie as one by one the guards returned into the room, some of them looked slightly more colourful than the others, most likely because they had fallen victim to Rain’s powers. 

Abby smiled as the men all lined up and watched Isaac, ready for his new orders. He told them to stand down when he had finally finished his brownie and the two teens watched the men dissipate. Abby took a piece of brownie for herself and turned to face Isaac. 

“Why did you even send them after us in the first place?” the girl asked, looking intently at her friend, with the hope of catching his every facial expression.

“I wanted to eat my brownie,” Isaac replied, staring intently at the food in his best friend’s hand. The girl rolled her eyes but accepted the answer.

“You’re a dick.”

“I know,” the boy replied, diving forward and engulfing the brownie in Abby’s hand. She rolled her eyes again and wiped her hand down her dress to get her bestie’s slobber off of her.

The pair turned at the sound of the door to see Samuel, Jacob and Rain enter. Sam looked incredibly roughed up which made Abby’s eyes widen before she quickly took out her phone and snapped a picture. The Samdom would love it, she loved it. His hair looked like it had been back combed and his eyes looked annoyed but still had a glint of amusement in them. He looked hot. 

Jacob scowled slightly at Isaac but didn’t say anything and Rain greeted the fellow cult member.

“Isaac! How are you?” Rain asked, smiling.

“I’m good thanks!” Isaac said grinning back. His voice was slightly muffled due to the brownie that he was still eating. 

“Hey,” Abby said, tapping her friend on the arm to get his attention, “Can we have the golden mushroom please?” 

Isaac nodded and opened the drawer of his desk. A slight glow came from it and the questers all shuffled closer to get a look. The mushroom was quite small but it was beautiful nonetheless. 

“CONGRATULATIONS SAMUEL.”

A man’s face appeared on the mushroom which made Abby squeal.

“OMG IT’S GEORGE HARRISON, HIIIII GEORGE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH,” she half shouted in the high pitched voice that she used whenever she was excited (or losing an argument, which was whenever she was having an argument)

“ABBY, IT IS NICE TO SPEAK WITH YOU, I APPRECIATE YOUR THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS.”

“But of course, you are the Lord and Saviour,” the girl replied, staring at the mushroom. Now that she finally had the chance to speak with her idol she had no idea what to say. Well, technically Sam was also her idol and she talked to him all the time. 

Abby looked at Samuel who had also been watching the mushroom. His beautiful golden locks were glowing from the mushroom, he was like a real life Rapunzel. The curls waved gently in a non-existent breeze and Abby swooned, before turning back to the scouser projecting himself onto the mushroom.

“So how do I get the money?” Samuel asked, ignoring Abby and Rain who were practically drooling next to him.

“IT WILL BE DEPOSITED IN YOUR BANK ACCOUNTS, YOUNG SAMUEL” the voice boomed before adding, “FAREWELL, QUESTERS.”

“Goodbye George,” Abby whispered with a hitch in her voice. 

They had done it, they had helped a dead scouser find a golden mushroom, nothing in their lives could ever be as interesting. 

...Unless?

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii! I hope everyone enjoyed the very first Samfic! I'd like to thank my friends for proof reading for me (I hope we didn't miss out any spelling or grammar mistakes) as always kudos and comments will be welcome!


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